May 2011

Spring has finally sprung but so far that seems to have only yielded rain. Just last month I sat in my dark living room on a dark afternoon typing out my monthly newsletter and lamenting the damp ugliness outside. Here we are again. My dogs are stir crazy and I still need sunshine. If only the universe would meet my demands.

When I start whining about what I want, I start to consider gratitude. For most of us, it's not hard to find someone who has it worse than we do on any given day. It's very easy to become attached to our desires and almost impossible to desire nothing. Think about that. To desire nothing would render you completely content. Ultimate santosa.

I read a verse the other day that is from the Vedantic scriptures. It says "Even the desire for liberation is a bondage." Even the desire to be free from ingratitude and wanting what we don't have binds you and creates restlessness. Hmmm...I think I may have to get that tattooed.

So what are we to do then? That's quite a quandry. Yoga tells us to become free from all desire, yet that wish for freedom is bondage in itself. A real catch-22. The trick is this: unselfish motives and desires are never binding. So though the mind can never be free from desire, by wishing for things that are pure, selfless, and have no expectation whatsoever, you are free from disappointment. The satisfaction is the desire itself. If you've ever done something just to make someone else happy and for no other reason, you are familiar with the feeling of selfless giving.

I try and remember this as I sit here and wish for sunny days so my dogs can go outside and I can finally accomplish some yardwork! I wait patiently though, since there are many more sunny days to come.